Congrats, it has been two years! We have managed to co exist peacefully without killing anything, breaking anything (well, not anything important). Kudos to us! Two years means it brings with it the inevitable baby talks. Well, we are not the ones talking, but we hear from all sides -from two sets of parents, their parents, parents' friends, friends' neighbors and before you know it is an epidemic. Such people should come with a statutory warning - we have baby fever and babies are all we can talk of!
It is not like we are the kind who hates children to be indifferent to all that baby talk. I know they can be adorable and that kind of makes it worse for us. It puts ideas into our heads when we are not ready. So we discuss kids, how girls are easier, boys are less trouble and what if she/he has my nose and cheeks and your colour and hair - Oh no, what would we have created. How will we give her/him the confidence and bring him/her up smart enough not to care for looks? See, what I mean - we so cannot be ready if our first thoughts are what if the baby gets our bad genes!
That's not all, we imagine wouldn't it be cute to have this kid sitting between us on the couch and playing when we have all this talk? Aww, what cuteness! But what will it do when we do not get up till 11 or 12 on a Sunday? What will it do when we are so rushed of time or just plain lazy and skip breakfast/lunch/dinner? - So NOT ready, people!
The way we are living currently, forget a baby, even a plant is not growing properly with us.
Can't you guys see, you are making us want a baby when we are not ready? And it is not even a baby that we want - it is the idea of this cute little-bundle-of-joy marketing ploy of a baby!
OK, parents/nosy relatives/friends, it's one thing to be good with kids and find them cute and it is totally another thing to have a kid of your own. I doubt I will find it to be as adorable when I do!
So I do what I usually do when I get this itch for a baby - surf maternity blogs! It doesn't take more than a few minutes of reading detailed description of labour or the aftermath of c-sections to put me off babies - at least for a while till I consider adoption. Though I have to admit, having my own baby as its advantage - who wouldn't love nine months of pampering?!
I wish one gave serious thought to having babies, instead of seeing them as the next step! Everything, whether or not to have, if yes, then would be the right time, reasons for wanting, not wanting, when and why then, why not earlier or later... biological clock is a concern, and careers, and finances...
ReplyDeleteAbout feelings for baby, I never gave babies much thought, but once born they became everything to me. First few years are extremely busy (taking care of them) and after that one gets used to the the fact that they are the ones one lives for.
I know! It is not like I can get up one morning and say - Hey, let's have a baby; also let's have pancakes for breakfast! I think I will love to have a baby someday, when I can devote time to the baby. But what I don't like is people around me trying to influence my decision (not very different from how advertisements work)! Yes, there is so much to plan for!
ReplyDeleteActually according to me, one can never prepare or be prepared to have a baby or what I am trying to say is... one can never be READY. Even if you think you are, once the baby is born you will realise its a whole new ball game altogether! But you will also realise that you have never seen so much joy and happiness before. Please dont worry about making time for the baby or getting up late or early etc. Once the baby is born, things like these sort out for themselves. I used to feel the same way you do but now everything revolves around my 8 year old daughter. You just have to take one step forward and the baby will walk you the rest of the way!
ReplyDeleteYeah, I get it that a baby is going to make my world go topsy-turvy. But I am not sure I am ready for that big a change right now or it could be just the fear of the first step :) I know this much, when I have a baby, I want to 'want' it with all my heart. I want to feel all mushy and go aww and say 'look, what I did for my baby' than 'look, what the baby is doing to me!'
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