I see you!

Has Facebook has become too popular for our good? Facebook is a great tool which helps us keep in touch with all and sundry, ex colleagues, old school mates, seniors/juniors in college – people whom we usually find it difficult to connect with often.

I remember an incident, when my mother ran into her school buddy from her home town in the busy streets of Mumbai. It was nothing short of euphoria for them when they came to know they both have been in this city for 4-5 years, and to think they met only now! And it was through her I got to know of all about my mother’s childhood escapades and I realized where I got my freak genes from!

And then I realized this would never happen to me! People of my generation would always know where most of our friends and friends’ friends are all the time and with the ‘checking in’ thing, we have the option to know where they are at any moment of the day. (Seriously, I know a guy who checks in into each and every place he ever sets his foot in, the railway stations, gym, home - every place, every day. If I ever want to run into him by accident I would know where to go, only I can’t act surprised at having run into him. He can just say “How come it is a surprise, I just checked in here?” OK, I am digressing here; this could very well be another post.)

Moreover, when you know so-and-so is in your town and you haven’t made the effort to meet up, it gets kind of awkward when you meet by accident; there have been times, when people have asked me “How come you didn’t call, you knew we were in Chennai, right? We did update it on Facebook” I had nothing to say to them except that a phone works both ways and that too was something I came up with after they left. Yes, I can be dismal at times!

All this makes me wonder do we need to know where everybody is every time? I even know who among my friends and cousins will be there at the Metallica concert this month, if I decide to go. If only they would keep updating their exact position at the palace grounds on the D day, I can go about greeting all of them in turn and make it a family affair!

My future children wouldn’t have to try hard to find out about their mother anytime; they would just have to check my Facebook profile! And my, what they wouldn’t find there! I can only hope they would have moved on to something else and Facebook is not so cool anymore!

Woman, but not from Venus!

How long are people going to talk about how Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus? We know that already! It has been drilled in to our brains right from our teenage years. I am sure we were aware of the *ahem* differences even before, but we might not have comprehended them in these exact terms. At least I was aware, right from the day my 3rd Std teacher made me sit next to this boy who loved to play hard and came back to class sweaty and slimy after every break and thought I might enjoy getting drops of seat squirted on me. However, that doesn’t mean that all men live like pigs at home. I learnt it the hard way; I got married to someone who puts the CDs in its proper cover – and he was not thrilled when he learned bed is where I keep my towel.
I just thought I will put up this list to save men from the shocks similar to the one Chandler* got when he realised girls don’t do pillow fights in their underwear when they hang out alone (Rolling eyes).

• Women don’t like to talk and connect all the time. There are times when we like to be left alone to do whatever we want to do by ourselves. I even keep gifting the guy games which can keep him occupied most of the time and that in turn gives me the time to read my books in peace.

• All women are not scared of Lizards, cockroaches - disgusted maybe, but not scared. Yes, I might not volunteer to get rid of them from the house, mostly because it is icky, but I won’t lose sleep over a tiny lizard hiding in my bathroom, nor would I stop drinking water till it is gone. Same goes for lightning or the dark. Lightning is just a loud noise which might disrupt my movie and I really don’t mind being alone at home when the guy travels. Yes, it is nice to have the guy around and all, but I can’t help secretly liking it when I have the house all to myself once in a while - I can keep the lights on till 4 am, I can sleep cross on the bed and I can keep how much ever wet towels I want on the bed!

• When we ask for your opinion on how a dress looks on us, we usually want your honest answer. It is OK to say, it doesn’t suit us or makes our arms look fat, provided it is not unsolicited. That makes the difference, you see.

• We might lose our ways, end up at a wrong place, but we have mouths and we can always find our way back one way or the other. Who said there is only road to a destination? Anyways, that really does not mean that you can just assume that we would lose our way or get lost and not turn up at all. You can make all the jokes you want, the funny guys out there needs some food, but please do realise we WILL reach.

• We might not always take hours to get dressed. Suppose, we get tickets to a Harry Potter movie preview which starts in like half an hour - dude, we can be ready in 2 minutes or we might even come as we are. Our dressing time CAN’T be used an excuse to turn up half an hour late.

The post it getting too long. So guys, please be a dear and get enlightened and help make the world a peaceful place!

* You don’t watch Friends? Which generation do you belong to? Still in teens, eh?

Anything for a change

I have been moving around quite a bit since I was a child, courtesy dad’s bank job. My dad’s colleagues always had a tough time getting their kids to adjust to the new place, new school etc. But not my dad, he had a daughter who used to beg him to get a transfer. I have always been happy moving, and in fact I was excited to be the new girl in schools. New place, new house, new room, new views fascinated me and still do. For me it was like a makeover and you don’t get all worried about adjusting to your new hairstyle. It was as simple as that.

Even after I started working I simply couldn't do the same job at the sample place for long (my view of time). I get the itch, I start questioning myself, what am I doing here? My life’s purpose can’t be sitting here producing reports after reports; I have to be destined for something bigger (I know I read too many fairy tales). So I resign. I just up and go!

Well, one of the reasons I got married was that I could move to Chennai from Bombay. But look who I got married to, a guy who has been living in one city and studying in the same school/college from kindergarten to graduation. He did move out for post graduation and work and that’s why he is here; but loves Cochin so much, that is where he would rather be. I really love Cochin and all; but settling down? I never really get why people want to settle down. It is not about liking a place; it is like saying, I love mangoes and I am going to keep eating mangoes for the rest of my life!

So, now that I live with this guy, I just can’t up and go. So, I do the next best thing; I re-arrange the furniture; change the drapes, the bed covers, restock the fridge; change the dinner cuisine, get new books, anything to feel a change. When that doesn’t suffice, we take a trip, which is the guy’s idea of change. But visiting a new place is not the same as living in a new place.

I wanted a change from Chennai so badly that I almost agreed to move to Cochin when the guy wondered if we should send our kid, who by the way is still in our heads, in the same school he went to for fifteen years, which even I went to for some time. I could almost imagine the teacher telling my kid “You are just like your mother – always dreaming in class, pay attention” or “Stop annoying throwing things at the girls, stop behaving like your dad”. I simply can’t let our kid receive the leftover scolding from our teachers. That did it. No moving in sight. I am back to changing bed covers.

All that talk!

Congrats, it has been two years! We have managed to co exist peacefully without killing anything, breaking anything (well, not anything important). Kudos to us! Two years means it brings with it the inevitable baby talks. Well, we are not the ones talking, but we hear from all sides -from two sets of parents, their parents, parents' friends, friends' neighbors and before you know it is an epidemic. Such people should come with a statutory warning - we have baby fever and babies are all we can talk of!

It is not like we are the kind who hates children to be indifferent to all that baby talk. I know they can be adorable and that kind of makes it worse for us. It puts ideas into our heads when we are not ready. So we discuss kids, how girls are easier, boys are less trouble and what if she/he has my nose and cheeks and your colour and hair - Oh no, what would we have created. How will we give her/him the confidence and bring him/her up smart enough not to care for looks? See, what I mean - we so cannot be ready if our first thoughts are what if the baby gets our bad genes!
That's not all, we imagine wouldn't it be cute to have this kid sitting between us on the couch and playing when we have all this talk? Aww, what cuteness! But what will it do when we do not get up till 11 or 12 on a Sunday? What will it do when we are so rushed of time or just plain lazy and skip breakfast/lunch/dinner? - So NOT ready, people!
The way we are living currently, forget a baby, even a plant is not growing properly with us.
Can't you guys see, you are making us want a baby when we are not ready? And it is not even a baby that we want - it is the idea of this cute little-bundle-of-joy marketing ploy of a baby!
OK, parents/nosy relatives/friends, it's one thing to be good with kids and find them cute and it is totally another thing to have a kid of your own. I doubt I will find it to be as adorable when I do!

So I do what I usually do when I get this itch for a baby - surf maternity blogs! It doesn't take more than a few minutes of reading detailed description of labour or the aftermath of c-sections to put me off babies - at least for a while till I consider adoption. Though I have to admit, having my own baby as its advantage - who wouldn't love nine months of pampering?!